The Healing Power of Pets during the Grieving Process

Hello my lovelies and welcome back to Simplyathena.blog. I want to start by apologizing for the LARGE gap in my posts; however, as you can probably gather from the title of this particular post i'm sharing with you today, these past months have been quite challenging for Athena and I.

In order for any of what I am going to share from here on out to make sense, I must start by letting you know a little of the background of the situation we've been going through. We have been absent, that is Thena and I, because my husband has recently passed away from cancer. He spent 3 months admitted in the hospital bravely battling his illness and fighting for his life. We all had the faith and hope that, due to his age and his previous health history being clear, he would be able to overcome his situation; however, God and life decided that it was time for him to go back home to heaven and for him to grace Thena and I from above as our guardian angel ☹️ 😢 *Sniff* We miss you Boo Boo *Sniff* ☹️.

Now, I share this information with you for two reasons: 1. to, once again, explain the fact that Athena and I have not forgotten about you, our readers (and to clarify our abrupt and prolonged absence) and 2. To be able to get into today's important topic which is how our fur babies can be a CRUCIAL part of our healing process when we go through a significant and traumatic event, such as a loss, in our lives.

Like any other curveball in life, my husband's sudden and unexpected departure caught ALL of us off guard... especially me. As any other newly-wed young couple, we had dreams and plans that we were working hand and hand to reach together. We had already chosen the first apartment that we were going to move out to, we had plans of getting our finances more in order so that we could buy our first home together, and of course we had the plan from day one to grow old together. It never crossed our minds that his time would come in his early 30's to physically leave us and it was more than shocking to know that a healthy and strong young man like my husband, someone who had NEVER even been IN a hospital setting, passed away from a serious illness like cancer. All of this in short to say that processing all of this has taken time and will take YEARS to get our minds across and for our hearts to heal from all that we have been through and all that we had to see him go through during his fight.

Needless to say, as someone who suffers with SEVERE anxiety and panic, having a fur baby like Athena by my side has been a life-saving component for me during this situation. My faith and my little one have been what has kept me positive, strong, distracted, and motivated to keep going throughout this whole process: from my husband's diagnosis to his passing. I can remember vividly all those hours in the hospital. It was extremely difficult to be there with him seeing him being told that he would have to fight valiantly for his life and to see him have to do so by being poked, prodded, and injected essentially with poison *Ahem* Chemo *Ahem* in order for him to have any chance at survival. Seeing him lose his hair, lose his physical strength, lose his ability to walk from blood clots, to see him in pain from the effects of the treatment, to see him intubated, and then to finally have to make the heart-wrenching decision to extubate him... it all became too much. Suffice to say that the entire time I don't remember one moment where my mind was ever at rest. My body would physically be at home or at work but my mind was ALWAYS on my husband and that constant question of "is he going to make it?" haunted my mind like an incessant and cruel demon that, for the life of me, would not leave me alone. The whole situation became a prime example of a living emotional purgatory. The fear and discomfort I experienced, emotionally, was more than anything that can be described in words here. It was then that I would rely on Athena's presence and unconditional love to someway, somehow, make it easier for me to take it minute as it came.

From the moment my husband was diagnosed to the minute my husband departed, Athena has been the one to help keep me grounded. As I've said in past posts, she gives me purpose and an added reason to get up in the morning. Now, she also gives me the strength to come home everyday. Lately, it's been difficult to get out of work and go home knowing that my husband will not be there waiting for me; however, knowing that he left me our furry little one and that she's still going to be there wagging her tail for me is a great help and motivation to come home. Whenever i'm at home and my mind starts to wander or starts to dabble to much in the sorrow and depth of my loss, her playful nature never fails to pick up my spirits. She'll use her little nose to move my arm so that I focus on her and pet her, she'll try to have me chase her or play with her, or she'll simply hop on the bed and lay beside me as I watch TV. With all these simple but important little actions, she reminds me that, no matter how difficult it is for me to wrap my head around and how much pain I may be feeling, my husband is now at peace and at rest in a better place. Most importantly, her actions remind me that, even through all this, she's still here, she still needs me, and she still depends on me. She helps me understand that I can't give up... not only for myself but for her sake as well. I also know that one of my husband's biggest requests would be for me to keep our little "Thena mama", as he used to call her, safe and sound.

My lovelies, this has been a difficult post to write; however, it had to be done. This is the reality of life... of both Athena's life and mine. This is also one of the many roads we've traveled together from her "Gotcha" day at two months old to today at just over a year old. We've learned together, grown together, and gone through all the good, the bad, and the ugly together. Tough as life may get sometimes... Thena, her presence, and her love somehow always find a way to keep me pushing through... even when I feel I can't anymore or don't want to. It's been more than a blessing to have her as part of my little family and I cherish everything she does for me just by being present each and every day...especially during this time where I am more lost and heartbroken than ever...

❤️ In Loving Memory of my Husband - Pablo Xochitiotzi ❤️

~Chiquitita and Thena Mama